The Last Day of the Year

Today is the last day of the year. The year has gone by so fast. As always, I still have no plans for tonight. We had about 10 different types of plans, but nothing was ever set in stone.

A house party, going to a "club", dinner, etc. But, none of those things really went anywhere. I am hoping that Frank hears something at work today. Otherwise, it is Happy New Year in my living room.

It's not like I NEED to go out, it's just fun to do so. I can't really do anything super crazy - I have to leave tomorrow at 9:30 am to get Colin. He has been away almost a week at his father's house. I miss him so much. Evertime I pick him up, he looks different to me...like he grew a foot or something.

Colin only sees his father twice a year. The week between Christmas and New Years, and then a week in either July or August. This is not my choice, but, his father has always been a jackass so I guess the lack of visits should not be a surprise. Whatever.

I may add to this post later - in the mean time.......HAPPY NEW YEAR!

My life - 10 days at a time

I think it is true. I am living my life 10 days at a time.

CD 1 - 10: Living carefree. Pissed that I got my period. But, excited that I did not have a 110 day cycle. Constantly checking the calendar for CD10, when I will start using OPKs. Thinking about my due date if I get pregnant this cycle.

CD 10-20(ish): Taking OPKs, waiting and waiting for a positive. Looking at an OPK in bizarre ways in the HOPE that maybe upside down, one eye closed, standing on one foot, using a black-light might produce a darker second line. Taking multiple OPKs because of my fear that I will miss a LH Surge. Tying really hard to keep sex fun with my husband.

CD 20-30(ish): Hoping that OPK that I was SURE was positive actually made me ovulate and hoping that we did the deed (DTD) enough. Writing on the calendar and circling with a big red marker 10 DPO. Over thinking every little non symptom - wondering if this was THE cycle. Taking HPTs way too early thinking that I will get a positive. Again doing the upside down, one eye closed, standing on one foot, using a black-light dance thinking that maybe I will be able to see a second line.

I don't want it to be like this, it just is.

Amy got ran over by a reindeer

Sing it....Amy got ran over by a reindeer, driving home from family's house Christmas Eve.....



Yup, I hit a deer driving home from my IL's house on Christmas Eve. This was about 10 minutes AFTER I avoided hitting a HUGE deer.



I don't know if I killed the deer, it was not on the side of the road....so, if it did die, it died in the woods.



Luckily, there is not too much damage to the car, and we are all OK. But, it damaged the side panel, the bumper, the hood, and broke the headlight that I just replaced. So, I am sure it will not be cheap to fix.



Here is a picture (PS - that is not mud on the side of the car. Apprently, that is deer snot!):

Cycle Day # 2

Well, I guess I should be happy that I did not waste my last expensive pregnancy test. I got my period yesterday; so today is CD2.

It is really weird, I am disappointed.....but not crying my eyes out upset. We have an RE appointment next month, so maybe we will get some answers soon.

This is going to sound weird, but I am hoping that I have another late(r) ovulation date. The night of CD13 and CD14 I will be out of town....without my husband. I really can't cancel it either.

So, if I ovulate on CD 20/21 like I did this past cycle I will be OK. However, you know damn right I will be jumping my husband as soon as I return on CD 15 - just to be on the safe side.

My appointment with the RE will be on CD19, I have no idea if it makes a difference or not.

On the plus side, I have been able to get my period on my own for several cycles in a row. With a decent cycle length (45, 30ish). So, there is still hope that we can do this on our own.

I am sure that when we meet with the RE, they will talk to us about our options and then order CD3 bloodwork. I am hoping that there will not be a CD3, because I will be pregnant.

Gift Cards and Shopping

OK, like I posted before, I am not happy with the quantity of the gifts for Colin this year. He is getting a few high ticket items. So, that means not as many.

So, I have been buying stupid non-gifts things that I would have bought anyway, but will wait until Christmas until he gets them (socks, underwear, etc)

So, I got a $50 AMEX gift card from my boss, I spent the entire thing on more gifts for Colin to put under the tree.

A bunch of little things like a cheat code book for his video games ($5); Magic cards - 3 Packs ($4 each, total $12); DVD/CD tower ($20); Pez for the stocking with refills ($3); Track Pants - 2 pair ($12.00).

I really don't need anything anyway. Besides, I would rather he has a nice Christmas than me buying myself a cute purse or something.

Although he does not believe in Santa anymore, he is still a little kid.

RE Appointment Made

I made my RE appointment.

I have been putting this off since November. I guess I kept thinking that THIS would be the cycle that worked. Maybe it has - I still have a few days before AF is even due - so who knows.

But, it turns out that the doctor that I want to see is only in my local office on Thursdays - so I figured I should make the appointment now, so I can be seen in early January.

My appointment is Jan 10th. I am HOPING and PRAYING that I have to cancel this appointment.

I guess I should be more specific

I know 11 dpo is still early, but I figured I would test this morning to be on the safe side. I am not a big drinker. But, I wouldn't drink at all if I got a + test.

Even though I am POSITIVE that I got a +OPK and did the deed (lol) I am not sure it worked. I totally do NOT feel pregnant. I will not test again until Sunday (probably - lol).

I am dissappointed, but since it is still pretty early, I know I still have a chance so I am not upset yet.

1 1/2 Drinks

I will probably have my 1 1/2 drinks tonight.

The End

Following Blogs

I read a few blogs on a regular basis. To be honest, there are some that are not listed on my "blogs I read" list. I go to a blog and then sometimes read the blogs that are on their list.

But, in reading these blogs, I feel so personally connected to each and every writer. It seems like I know so many personal details about their live. And, that I actually KNOW these people.

I have actually only met a handful of the people that I read their blogs. I follow every one so closely hoping for good news. I check several times a day when I know a certain date is coming up, just to see if there is an update......yeah, I know, I am a loser.

My sister has also sent me a few links to other blogs as well....although, I am still not sure if she reads mine.

If you read my blog and want to share your blog (if it is not listed on the side), please let me know and I will add you.

My blog is about everything and anything....so your blog can be any topic also.

Do you think we made a baby?

I am 8 DPO and I am going crazy. Tried to keep myself busy, and I really don't think about it every second of the day. But, the thought does cross my mind a few times a day.

I asked Frank last night if he thought we made a baby. He replies, "Hell yeah!!" I hope his confidence is a good sign :)

I even had a few drinks last night - thinking to myself that it hopefully will be one of the last drinks for 9 months!

I am not gonna test until Friday, which at 11DPO is still very early. But, we are going to a party and I would hate to drink my normal 1 1/2 drinks and worry about it for nine months. I am not a big drinker. I maybe drink a total of a dozen drinks a year. So, it won't be a big deal if I do not have a drink on Friday.

Even at my Christmas Party a few weeks ago I just drank soda....even though I knew I could have thrown back a few if I wanted to.

So just a few more days until the testing begins!!!

1400 Cookies

Yep, you read that right. 1400 cookies.

Every year my sisters and I have a cookie baking marathon. We go to my parents house and bake all day. We always lke to set a goal of 100 dozen. This year we made 119 dozen so that is a little over 1400 cookies.

We have been doing this for god knows how long. And every year we give them all away. OK - maybe we keep a few for ourselves, but the majority of them are given to others. People at work, neighbors, in-laws, etc.

I love the fact that all my sisters get together to do this. We do a lot as a family and I would not have it any other way.

By the end of the night we are exhausted and my parents house if DIRTY....mom is in charge of cleaning, we are in charge of baking.

Let me tell you, though - I hated that hout long frive home at almost 11 pm last night!!!

DPO ???

I can honestly say I had to look at my chart to see what DPO it was. I have been really busy the past few days so I lost track. I can totally understand why people stress out over the 2WW. I am only 4 DPO and can't believe how much longer I have to go.

I actually only have one HPT (internet cheapie) in the house - and I think I may have gotten it wet at some point. Which means that I either have to buy more now and test, test, test starting at 10 DPO...... or wait until I am at at least 14 DPO and buy one. Gee, let's see what do you think I will do???

I hate buying them in the dollar store though. I feel like a teenager trying to sneak out and get a pregnancy test. I always get the cashier that gives me "the look". You know, the look of "why the hell is she buying 10 pregnancy tests" or "Can't she afford a real test" or "it only takes one test". I am sure everyone has been given "the look".

And, or course, I refuse to buy a "real" test unless I am sure it will be a positive result. Pregnancy test are EXPENSIVE!!

So, now we wait

Got 2 positive OPKs on Sunday. So, I possibly ovulated on Monday. So, now we wait. Just in time for Christmas - although you know I will be testing early. I am a member of the PIAC (pee in a cup) addict club!!!

Also, I have a Holiday party on the 21st, so will probably test that morning so I will know if it is OK to drink or not.

This is my first official 2WW; I know it will be a long one! I just hope that I actually ovulated, not just the LH surge. Especially since I am not having any signs of ovulatation (no cramps, etc).

I am going to an RE in January if I do not get a BFP this cycle. I have been putting off making the appointment since October. Each cycle I think, "this will be it" and I won't need the appointment. Or that somehow making the appointment will jinx the cycle.

Luckily, the place that I am going to go does not have a long waiting list. When I called originally, they said that I can get an appointment within 1-2 weeks. I know some women that have to wait 6-8 weeks for an appointment at other clinics.

The office that I would be going to is an office in a smaller town. But is part of a huge association of other offices. Plus all the doctors go to all offices. It is one of the better clinics in my state. I got lucky because it is only a 20 minute drive from my house and on my way to work.

So, I hope in less than 2 weeks I post my BFP!!!!! Keep those fingers crossed.

A positive OPK!!!!!

As you read a few weeks ago, this cycle is really weird.

I was using the CBEFM and since I had to start my cycle over after I already used 3 sticks, I ran out when I had to start over.

I also did not have any left-over internet cheapie OPKs. So, I went to CVS and refused to spend $50 on new sticks for the CBEFM. So, I went with Answer Brand. $20 for 20 OPKs. The same price as the Dollar Tree, but less embarassing to purchase.

I have been taking them for the past few days - nothing to report.....until today.

I took one at 1:15 PM - got a positive result in less than a minute!!! I still waited the full 5 minutes because I was sure the control line would get darker. It did get darker, but the test line was also getting darker.

I really thought it might be a fluke. Maybe I dipped it too long, or maybe the strip was actually reversed and the "test" line was really the control line.

Since I doubted it, I took another on at 7:30 PM (according the instructions, you can take any time of day)

Yep, you guessed it. Another positive!!!! Today is CD19, counting from the new CD1 (see sidebar)

Here are the set of pictures. I am getting some tonight!!

OPK Pictures

1:15 PM - CD 19 7:30 PM - CD19

101 Things in 1001 Days

OK - I guess I am a bit of a copy cat. I was thinking about my "list" and went to my good friend , Google, for help. I can't rememeber exactly what I searched for, but a bunch of "101 things to do in 1001" days came up. So, I decided to look into it.

A lot of what I found were lists of actual things to do or buy or try. But, when I started my list, a lot of my "items" are not so specific. But, I am OK with that. Heck, it is MY list.

This is a description of what the 101 Things to do in 1001 days is all about:

The Mission: Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria: Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on my part).

Why 1001 Days?: Many people have created lists in the past - frequently simple goals such as New Year's resolutions. The key to beating procrastination is to set a deadline that is realistic. 1001 Days (about 2.75 years) is a better period of time than a year, because it allows you several seasons to complete the tasks, which is better for organising and timing some tasks such as overseas trips or outdoor activities.

Some common goal setting tips:
1. Be decisive. Know exactly what you want, why you want it, and how you plan to achieve it.
2. Stay Focussed. Any goal requires sustained focus from beginning to end. Constantly evaluate your progress.
3. Welcome Failure. Frequently, very little is learned from a venture that did not experience failure in some form. Failure presents the opportunity to learn and makes the success more worthy.
4. Write down your goals. It clarifies your thinking and reinforces your commitment.
5. Keep your goals in sight. Review them frequently, and ensure that they are always at the forefront of your thinking.

So, I have started my own list. I am about 1/2 way there to 101. So, here goes.....(in no particular order)

101 Things to do in 1001 days - my list

1. Grow and maintain my nails
2. Plan a “just us” day every month with just me and Colin
3. Have a date night at least once per month - every month
4. Remember that sometimes “good enough” is …well, good enough
5. Make a will
6. Call my grandmother out of the blue - just to tell her I love her
7. Drink more water
8. Walk instead of drive
9. Encourage Colin to learn the guitar (and not guitar hero)
10. Join a book club
11. Remember to stop and smell the roses
12. Visit my local museums
13. Finish an entire Sudoko book - wrong answers or not
14. Invite friends over for a home cooked meal - at least once a month
15. Try to find a red wine that I will actually drink
16. Learn and make 10 new recipes that my family loves
17. Take at least one “just for me” class at the local college
18. Understand football enough to make my own picks for Fantasy Football
19. Send a note by MAIL to someone I am thinking of at the moment
20. Have a neighborhood BBQ and invite the crabby lady across the street
21. Send in my application for the Women’s Crisis Center volunteer program
22. Figure out what looks best on me and not care about what size it is
23. Buy clothes for my current size, not the size I think I still fit into
24. Travel to a state that I have never been to before
25. Start a new family tradition
26. Learn all the phone numbers that are saved in my cell phone
27. Go to see a Broadway play (or other NYC show), at least once a year
28. Learn to knit or crochet
29. Write a compliment letter ever time I receive great service AND mail it
30. Go to Las Vegas
31. Pay for the toll of the person behind me - at least once a year
32. Make 2 weeks of meals in one day and freeze them
33. Go to bed late once a week just to spend more time with my husband
34. Make a complete list of birthdays of all the cousins (and their kids).
35. Call above on their birthday
36. Post on my blog at least 3 times a week
37. Go away for the weekend by myself - just a me vacation
38. Get really dressed up and invite friends over for a fancy cocktail party
39. Learn how to skip stones
40. Re-learn to make stained glass
41. Surprise someone when it is not their birthday
42. Pay cash for all purchase for a whole month
43. Take a long distance road trip
44. Invite someone from church for an after service lunch
45. Blow-dry my hair for work at least once a week
46. Send a local family in need a donation just because
47. Learn to stop rolling my eyes
48. Write a letter to let my son know how much I love him
49. Meet Colin’s step-mother

I am going to make a separate blog of this list and update it has times goes by.

I'm gonna make a list

Every year I make the same old New Year's resolutions. And just like everyone else in the world, I break them by January 15th.

This year I want to make a list - not a resolution, but a list of realistic things that I would like to do in 2008. I am sure that the list will include stuff like lose weight, but I think it might be things like "grow and mantain my nails"; "plan Just Us days for me and Colin"; stuff that can be realisticly acheived and that will make me happier.

Ok - so I have 2 (above) so I hope by the end of the year, I will have a ton.

Suggestions are welcome!

Maybe it's the chain letters????

I HATE!!!! chain letter e-mails. Now, there are times that I do send a forward. But it is only when I think it is really funny. I also delete all the extra crap and also delete the "forward to 10 friends in 30 seconds" crap - plus give the disclaimer that I never forward, but found this funny, etc.

I don't mind the funny forwards, or the forwards that have the question/answer things. But, do I really need a picture of Mary, the mother of Jesus, sent to me saying that if I do not forward then I will be subject to horrible bad luck?? And not have a bad day bad luck....but struck down by lightening bad luck. Please, give me a break.....and please stop sending me these.

Is this the reason why I have had no luck in the past year??? Because I don't send the forwards??

Maybe I should start a chain letter, maybe that would make up for the fact that I never forward the ones I have received in the past.

For ONCE, Colin is ahead of the game

OK, I have never been one to spoil my child. And to be honest, Colin is normally the kid that gets a "new to him" toy/video game/etc.

For years, Colin has gotten whatever game system that was 3 systems ago. Mainly because the were cheaper and I can buy used.

Example, Colin has a Game Boy Advance. Since this model, they have made Gameboy SP, Nintendo DS and Nintendo DS Lite (basically all gameboys). Colin only got this gameboy last year. Each new model plays the older games so trading up would never be an issue.

For his birthday he was given a used Playstation 2. Playstation 3 came out last year. So, he is still repeating the "new to him" trend.

BUT!!!!!! Colin's birthday was Nov 1st. About 4 days before his birthday a new game came out (Guitar Hero III for Playstation 2). I had traded in a few games and an old system and got this brand new super cool game.

Colin got it WAY before most of his friends got it (most MIGHT get it for Christmas)....and now it is considered one of the "Big Ticket Items" for this Christmas. Which means that you can't get it - sold out.

So, for once....Colin has the newest and greatest "hot item" and is the envy of all his friends. I think probably for the first time........oh wait, there was the original Tickle me Elmo....but that is another story all together.

Bigger project than I thought

OK - I have been making custom candy wrappers for about 5-6 years now. I sell them on ebay (well, right now I am on an ebay break).

I thought it would be nice to make candy bars for everyone in my husbands department (12 people) and for everyone at my office (30 people). This is fine, I do this all the time so it really does not take too long.

Yeah, well I thought I would step it up a notch this year. I saw on a scrapbook site about a little bag that you can make out of one sheet of paper. I played around with the measurements and figured out the size I would need to fit the Candy Bar.

Well, since I have this pretty bag, I don't want to have JUST the candy bar. So, I decided to fill it with Peppermint bark, the candy bar, and other candies.

Well, the little bags are taking longer than I want and I can't seem to properly melt the white chocolate for the peppermint bark. UGH. I will do them all. When I start a craft, I just HAVE to finish it (not because I am stubborn - but beacuse I don't want to waste the supplies LOL)

I will post pics when I get home tonight.