Friday, July 31, 2009

Interesting Conversation with my Teenager

When Lil J had his visit on Wednesday, we happened to see the boy that we did respite for over the weekend. I guess Wednesday is visit day for him as well.

Lil J was thrilled to see him, it was cute.

Colin (my teenager) was able to meet Z for a little while on Sunday and thought he was really nice.

Well, yesterday, Colin and I were talking about Z, saying that it was nice to see him, that Colin liked him, bla bla bla.

Colin then asked why he could not stay with us. I of course explained that it was not fair to put him in with Lil J. Plus, if the new baby is a girl, it is not even allowed.

He then said, "...well, what is wrong with my room? We could easily put bunks in there. Besides, it is only a bedroom and I have the other room as well"

Colin basically has 2 rooms to himself. Two of our bedrooms are "railroad" rooms - the ONLY way to get to Colin's room is to walk through this railroom room. So, he has his bedroom. And, then has a Hang-Out room that has his TV, game system, couch, etc. It is like a living room. Even though this room is TECHNICALLY a bedroom (has a door, closet, and window), we could not count is as a bedroom according to the state. It has to do with a privacy issue.

I was kinda shocked. We never considered using Colin's room. Especially since our age range is 0-5.

I just thought the conversation was interesting. We are not going to look into getting him moved. Heck, I don't even know if it is possible. But, I do know that Z has only been in care for about a month, so I would guess it might be possible if the current foster parents had issues with the placement.

We have a meeting with Lil J's case worker and with our family resource worker on Monday. I will probably bring it up in conversation. Maybe if his situation changes in the future, maybe they will keep us updated.

I don't even think Colin REALLY knows how he feels about it. I personally think it is a big deal to share a room after 15 years of NOT sharing. Especially now, since he is almost 15. Ya know, the prime time for wanting privacy, etc.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Set aside my embarassment and glad I called the doc

NOTE: This post is FULL of TMI.

I posted the other day on a message board about an embarassing side effect of pregnancy - aka hemmorhoids.

I had a few large external ones and they were beyond painful. I tried a bunch of OTC stuff and nothing was really working.

This morning, still in extreme pain, I noticed some bleeding. I decided enough was enough and just had to get over my embarassment.

I called the doc and I am so glad I did.

They had me come in for the next available appointment. I went in and got examined and right away she said "this needs to be taken care of ASAP" and sent me to a GI specialist (never knew this was the kind of doc that would treat something like this - learned something new)

I went to the GI Doc and she agreed that my situation was pretty bad and needed to be taken care of TODAY.

For those that do not know, a hemmorhoid is a basically a blood clot.

Well, I had 6 - SIX!!!! very large ones back there. It was obvious that they were severe because of the size and color.

The doc that did the exam knew that another doc was "great with OB patients with this problem" so she called him in. He was making lots of jokes....did not really help at the time, but I liked that he was not so stone cold.

It was VERY painful procedure. I was seriously crying my eyes out. I was injected with litocain (sp) and then the cut into each one and removed the clot. The shots did not cover the whole area so I needed multiple injections. It was so very painful, I was actually bitting my my arm to help with the pain.

He asked if I wanted to see what was done, I said NO! - but then he made some kind of joke so I looked. the clots that were removed were HUGE - there were 6 in total and 4 of them were the size of a small grape. Even the second doc said it was a VERY severe case, especially considering that it was a short time that the problem started.

I now have 6+ incisions. The doc said that the pain should be much less now, because it is the clot (usually) that causes the pain. He gave me some meds as well. Hopefully the pain will be better soon. Right now, I am still in a lot of pain, and it takes me a while to get around. They said I will probably bleed for a little while as well too.

I really did not ask what was the danger in NOT getting it done today, I was just thrilled that it was something I could do today. Well, thrilled until I realized how totally PAINFUL AS HELL it would be done for the procedure.

I did ask the OB and the GI if this would lessen my chances of having a vaginal delivery, and they all said it would have no impact on having a vaginal delivery - which is a very good thing.

They also said that I have a HIGH possibility of getting more in the next 2 months and probably will again in a vaginal delivery. But, they said to call them (the GI) if this happens again, and to skip the OB. Of course let them know about it.

I NEVER knew that this problem could be well, such a problem.

I know docs see this stuff all the time, but for me, it was embarassing to get up the nerve to call the doc. But, in the end - I am very glad I did.

So, I just wanted to put it out there, CALL YOUR DOC if you are in pain or something seems off.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Respite Placement Went Well

We did respite this weekend for an 11 yr old boy. We only accepted it because my son was away and knew we could use his room.

He was really polite and nice too. Lil J loved him and was annoying him all weekend. Z (the 11 yr old) put up with Lil J's nonsense all weekend. It was really sweet

Z was very well behaved at the BBQ wedding that we had on Sat as well.

If there was a possibility that we could "keep" him, I would. But, we just do not have the space. We never intended to put a child with Colin and we don't think it is fair to put an 11 yr old with a 3 yr old and also a newborn in the fall.

Yesterday I dropped him off at camp, it was a sad thing - not emotional, but it turned out he really had nothing he needed. This was not obvious to me, of course, until I dropped him off. So, I had to return to the camp later in the day with all the things that he needed. I heart just totally stopped for a sec. I felt really bad for the kid - and really pissed at the current foster parents.

When he was dropped off, he only had a small duffle bag with clothes. I thought it was a small bag. But, it is summer, and I know Colin had a pretty small bag when I packed his clothes last week.

I asked him yesterday morning if he had everything he needed, and if not we could go to the store. He said that he had everything he needed. I also asked him if he needed a sleeping bag, and he said that they "had that stuff there". He is 11, not 5 - so I believed him. BIG MISTAKE.

I go to register him, he only has his registration for and a medical form on file - nothing else. So, I had to fill out 6 different camp forms. Things like a travel release, a photo release, a "don't sue me if your kid gets hurt" release, etc. I filled them out, but it really does not mean much. If he gets hurt, it is not like my signature means anything. Whatever, they obviously did not care.

Then, I drove him to his cabin. As soon as I walked in, I realized that there was going to be a big problem. All the bunks were BARE and the staff were helping kids make their bunks. OH NO - Z had nothing!

I pulled a staff member aside and told him what was going on. Told him I would come back with everything he needed.

I then asked Z, if he had packed things like shampoo, soap, sunscreen, bugspray, etc - NOPE!!!! He really just had a toothbrush.

So, I went home to pack him a bag. Lucky for me the camp is only about 6 miles from my house. I got a sheet set, pillow, sleeping bag, shampoo, soap, deordorant, sunscreen, bug spray, towels, etc.

When I went back to drop them off, I asked and found out that he had no money in his "camp account" which would be used for the general store. He will be there for 2 weeks and had nothing. So, I left $20 in his account.

At this point, I don't care if I get the bigger stuff back (sheets, sleeping bag, etc). But, I just felt so bad!!!

Then, it turns out, the emergency contact numbers were his current foster parents, nothing else. Yes, it could have been their cell phones. But, they are on vacation this week. So, I left my number as well.

So, other than Sunday, the weekend went really well :)

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Mask of Pregnancy

I have developed a few not so pleasant "side effects" of pregnancy. Some are too "personal" to even talk about. But, I did want to share one.

I have developed something called the "Mask of Pregnancy" Kinda looks like I got some kind of funky tan, but, no....it is this weird super freckle thing. Like a cluster with no rhyme or reason behind the pattern.

I wanted to share some pics, mind you - no make-up, no shower, not too pretty. I have it on my forehead, nose, and cheeks. I am one hot momma.






Friday, July 24, 2009

Doing Respite this weekend

We got a call the other day to do a respite placement for this weekend. It is for an 11 yr old boy and just for the weekend.

This is not a placement that we could normally take, but Colin is away until Sunday so we could use his room. I think it would have been hard to put an 11 yr old in a room with a 3 yr old.

We were contacted several times in the past about doing respite. But in the past, it was always WAY too much of a short notice.

While this was short notice as well, it worked for us. We I accepted the temp placement.

He will be coming today in the late afternoon and I will drop him off at camp on Sunday. I really like the fact that I am dropping him off at camp. We have been told of many situations where respite turned into full-time placement.

Even when I told my neighbor that works in the field, she mentioned "are you SURE it is just respite" So, it does make feel better that I am dropping him off at camp.

Not that I am trying to get rid of him. But, it is not a placement that works for us on a full-time basis. I can't make Colin share a room after he has had his own room for almost 15 years. And I can't put an 11 yr old with Lil J. Especially since the new baby will already be sharing with Lil J. I personally do not think it is fair to the 11 yr old.

But, it should be cool for an 11 yr old to come into our house. He will have his own room, his own TV room, his own game system, his own PC, etc. Since Colin is not much older than him, all his stuff is there for him to use.

I keep hearing that he is super nice, really polite, etc. I hope so. :)

Monday, July 20, 2009

Some Pictures that I can actually share

We went down the shore again this year. Colin was away at camp, so it was just the me, the hubbs, and Lil J. It was nice to get away and just relax.

We had great weather and Lil J loved the beach. I just love digital cameras. I took 157 pictures over the course of 3 days. I did make sure I actually took a bunch of the back of Lil J's head - the only pics I can actually share.

I was thinking that I would like to come back down here in August at some point - but then I thought about it and I really only have a few more weeks of travel time. I am almost 30 weeks pregnant (OMG!) and "down the shore" would be about 2 hours from my hospital. So, I really only have about 4 more weeks of travel time. I just can't chance anything after that. But, seriously - I am almost 30 weeks!!!!!

So, here are some pics from our trip:






























Thursday, July 9, 2009

It's Official - I am Advanced Maternal Age

Personally, I think it SUCKS that 35 is considered "Advanced Maternal Age". I for one seriously think that I am just starting out in my life. Yes, I have had lots of great things before this day, and have loved each and every one of them.

I am just saying that at 35, I think I still am pretty young. I know that when I was 20 or so, 35 seemed OLD, but now that I am there, doesn't seem so bad.

So, there you have it - according to the land of OBGYN, I am an old lady.

Oh, yeah - and hello 28 weeks :)

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

I am evil

Lil J has been cranky all morning. Well, today is visit day. So, as cranky as he has been - I have actually been someehat happy about it.

He is always a great kid, mostly well behaved. But, why can't he be cranky for his visit with his mother???

I was kinda happy that he would probably still be cranky when the visit rolled around at noon.

Well, I guess Karma just kicked me in the ass. Visit was cancelled for today and now I am stuck with the cranky kid.

Lucky for me, Colin seems to be the cranky remedy - how, I have no idea. But, he is calm now while he lays with Colin watching TV. It could be that Lil J is watching TV in the middle of the day (something I do not allow), or that he is chilling with Colin. But, either way, he is quiet now. Well, at least for now :)

Monday, July 6, 2009

Passed the 3 Hour Glucose Test !!!

I am seriously hating calls from the OB and visits there as well. Every time I hear from them, it is something else.

I had my first growth scan last week due to the marginal insertion of the cord. Growth was fine, but have high fluid. Doc said that the fluid level could be high due to high sugar levels. Since I had my sugar test the same day, he knew we would just have to wait for those results.

Well, I found out today that I passed - yipee!. But, now it makes me kinda worried about the other reasons why the fluid levels would be high. It is obviously not due to high sugar levels.

Here are the results of my 3 hour GTT:

Fasting: 80
1 Hour: 127
2 Hour: 114
3 Hour: 78

My highest was still well within the normal ranges. So, no sugar problems there.

But now, I also find out that my hemoglobin (iron) is low. The range is 11.5-15 and mine is 9. So, not super low, but low. It is just one more thing that has to be taken care of / monitored.

So, now I have to be put on an iron supplement. I am taking so many meds it is crazy.

But I am thrilled that I passed the 3 hour sugar test.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

27 Week OB Appointment

I am starting to hate going to the OB office. Every time I go there, I get yet another thing that has to be monitored.

So, here is the run-down of the appointment today. It was a marathon appointment, with my repeat 3 hour glucose test, growth scan due to the marginal insertion of the cord, and my first 3rd tri appointment. What? Did I just say 3rd trimester??? Yipee.

Weight - Lost 3 pounds. Yikes. I have to go back and look at all of the ups and downs, but I know that this basically means that I have yet to gain any weight. I am pretty sure I am now less than I was at my first OB appointment. I always ask not to know the actual number, just want to know how much I am up or down. The doc is not concerned at all, especially since I am no skinny minny.

Blood Pressure - just fine at 110/80. Even though my norm is 110/70, she said it was fine.

Growth Scan - um, yeah - I got a big fatty on my hands. No issue with growth restriction there. At 27 weeks, I am currently measuring at 27W6D. That is almost a week ahead. The baby weighs 2 lbs 9 ozs. WHAT!?!?!?!? That means I could have a linebacker on my hands. Frank was over 10 pounds at birth. Yikes!!!

I got to see the baby and got some great 3D shots, maybe I will add one to this post when I scan them. The tech said that I got great pics because there was so much fluid - which I guess makes great pics. I hear lots of fluid = good thing.

NOT!

I meet with the doc after the scan and he says that while he is not concerned about the growth at this point, the fluid is very high. OK, so extra fluid = bad thing.

He said that sometimes, if a woman has Gestational Diabetes, that it could cause extra fluid in the sac. I won't get my blood work results until next week. He said that there could be other reasons, but said that he would not go into them until we get the sugar tests back.

Must.Stay.Away.From.Google.

Google is a scary place. So, I have to go back in 2 weeks to check the fluid levels and at that time they will determine if my next growth scan will be 1 or 2 weeks after that one. They have to have 3-4 weeks in between growth scans. So, yes - I will basically be spending my life at the docs.

Oh yeah, and did I mention (yes, I know I did) - HELLO THIRD TRIMESTER!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

His mom is a piece of work....

So, my husband and I have decided not to do face to face meetings with Lil J's mom anymore. I will continue to drop him off at the CPS office, but the aide will come out to my car and get Lil J. She will also bring him to my car after the visit.

We thought this was best because his mother has become very demanding on me and has basically been mean to me. So, since I am not required to have a face to face with her, I am not doing it anymore. Plus, it gives me a minute to talk to the aide alone to discuss anything that happened during the visit.

Well, I am SO glad that I did not do a face to face today.

When I dropped him off, the aide said that his mom is mad that we are not doing face to face anymore, so the aide reminded her that face to face is NOT the norm.

When she brought him back, she said that now the mom was mad her HER. Of course I needed more details on that one. Well, the aide asked Lil J if he had gone swimming yet. Well, before J could answer, the mom yelled "He better not have!"

She was pissed that J went "swimming" in a baby pool with less than a foot of water. And that she told the case worker of her concerns about the water. These concerns were told to me also by the case worker and by his mom herself.

I previously told her that I am very careful around the water and that J would always be very well supervised and I would never let him in a larger pool by himself

Well, the mom went on and on how she would tell a judge that he is not allowed in a pool, and that her wishes MUST be followed. Um, yeah - OK, you mean tell a judge when you don't show up for court again.

Besides...in NJ, the summer temp can easily get to 100 degrees, he should never go swimming, or wading in a pool??

Yes, she is concerned that he will drown, but so am I. Yes, I know - NO ONE ever intends to drown, and it is usually an accident that no one knew would happen. But, I would do everything in my power to have that not happen.

So, in the end - I am VERY glad we did not do that face to face today.
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