Saturday, May 16, 2009

Bio Mom wants him moved....

There was supposed to be a visit yesterday - you can read the details below.

I called the bio mom today (as requested by the case worker), and after almost giving up because she never answered the phone, she finally answered.

She spoke to Lil J for a little while, even though I know he really had no clue. He kept referring to Mommy, and then saying things about me. Whatever.

She then asked to speak to me and she tells me that she will be submitting a formal request to the courts (well, her lawyer will be) at the next court date to have him moved to her state of resisdence.

Side note, he was removed in my current state, she was "in between" addresses and now is living in a neighboring state. I googled it, and driving it is about a 3.25 hour DRIVE. Using public transportation (I figured it out) would probably take about 4+ hours each way.

She is claiming that showing up to visits (using public transportation) places an unfair financial burden on her. Since the case is in my state, all visits have to be done here. She claims the distance is not fair as well.

Heck, I did not tell you to move to the end of the state.

She says that she WOULD see her kid as much as she could, but she can not afford it, and if he was closer to her, she would see him often. She says this even though she has made NO attempt at all to make visits. Like I said, she has not seen him since the end of Feb.

I know I am rambling, I am not even sure the point of the post. I am just so upset that this is possible. Will a judge really remove a child in a VERY stable home just make it easier for the mom?

It is killing me to think he could leave under these circumstances.

EDIT TO ADD:
I just wanted to put it out there that going into foster care, I knew there would be a possibility that kids are returned to parents. But this situation would be totally different. Lil J would still be foster care, just in a different state. So, he would be placed in a home that may or may not be a good fit for him.

If the placement is not a good fit (like his previous placement was not), then he would be moved again. This is just breaking my heart.

9 comments:

Kristen said...

Oh Amy, I'm so sorry. I'm secretly hoping maybe his bio mom will cop out on calling her lawyer like she cops out on everything else having to do with Lil J! Keep me updated, please!

Kristen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jen said...

I'm sorry. And just because she petitions to have it done doesn't mean it will be. They should take into account the welfare of the child and it doesn't sound like it would benefit Lil J as much as staying with you would.

Kristen said...

Oh Amy! I am so sorry, but the process to transfer out of state is a long one most times, as the other agency has to open the case, find a placement, investigate the mom currently in her place, etc...
GOOD LUCK and I hope that Lil J stays put. HUGS to you!

Notwifezilla- Jackie said...

Amy this sucks! I have to agree with the others though, her track record is pretty poor and so I wouldn't let this get you down until you hear that it is official.
For what it's worth, you think should would have tried to find a place closer to her kid in that situation!!!
Hugs!!

Linda said...

I'm so sorry Amy! Hugs to you and I hope it works out in your favor!

Megan said...

I am so sorry Amy- I am praying that all works out.

Lana said...

Huge (((HUGS))) t you Amy. I am praying that this all works out for you and Lil J. I am also hoping that the BM changes her mind with that silly excuse that she has right now

Anonymous said...

I'm so sad that's even a possibility after all he's gone through to get to you.. of course you knew being a foster mom could be hard and the children can leave, but he has found such a good place with you. You never know what might happen, and remember you have only done GOOD for him in the time you've had him... will pray hard!!!

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