This will be the final part of the long posts - I will try to just jump to now (2008).
OK - Over the past several years we have had a tutor for Colin. I am not 100% sure that it really worked. But, it told Colin that we were serious about his school work and was something that we had to do.
When we moved to NJ I thought this would be the perfect time to have a fresh start. Colin had just finished 5th grade in NY and been having such a hard time - socially, education wise, etc
I spoke to the new school and asked if we could just keep him in the 5th grade. A couple of reasons:
1) I thought is would be the perfect time - nobody knew him so would not know that he got "held back"
2) He was young - so again, no one would know that he did not belong in the 5th grade
3) He was small - again, no one would question it.
I got the same response (AGAIN) - his test scores to not warrant him repeating the same grade.
So, let's get to middle school. His school uses this program called K12 Planet. Basically what it is is an on-line program that lists all his classes, all his assignments, all his grades.
You are thinking, "Wow, what a great tool". This is good and bad. If Colin was doing some of the assignments, or doing OK on tests, well, then I would get his report card and say "an 80 - good, but I know you can do better"
But, instead, I see missing homeworks, assignments that are not handed in, test scores. So, when I see that he gets a 100 on several tests, and then has 4 missing homeworks - it is really apparent why he has a 75 average in the class.
Any missing homeworks are an automatic score of 0. His school has a policy in place that homework must be handed in on the date it is due. If returned late, there is no partial credit.
So, I have been using K12 planet to check up on Colin's progress.
It is always the same arguement - "Colin, why are you not handing in homework" - "Why are you lying to me when I ask if you have any homework" - "Can't you see that the only reason you are failing is because of homework".
I try to explain to him that if you get 100's on tests but get 0's on homework that you can possibly do very bad in the class.
We have this conversation about every 2-3 weeks, after every progress report, after every report card.
Every month I have to send a letter to each teacher asking for the assignments that he is missing. I know he will not get credit for them (school policy) - but I still WANT THEM DONE!
I am at my witts end - I can't keep having this conversation.
About Feb of last year I told him that he was not going to get to the 8th grade - that his grades were too bad and his attitude towards school was not any better.
He did in fact get to the 8th grade.
Now, I don't think that he will EVER make it in High School. High school will swallow him whole.
We have an appointment with his guidance counselor on Tuesday to discuss everything again. I doubt I will get anywhere. I have had the same conversation with the counselor as well. Nothing is ever done. The last time we had a meeting, I wanted him re-evaluated - I was told that he is probably just lazy and that the testing process is a long one.
Right now Colin is failing 3 classes - so it is possible that he will fail 8th grade all on his own.
I know I totally skipped a few years but it is the same story over and over again so I guess I would just be repeating myself.
So, there it is - probably something that I NEVER thought I would share with the general public. Mainly because I think it makes me look like a bad mom.
Who knows - the posts may be deleted.
Thanks for reading if you read this far :)