Some backstory. Colin sees his father 2x times a year. Yup, TWICE a year. This has been the "norm" since he was 4 yrs old. Before that, he did not see him at all. His father does not live near us, he is about 3 hours away - this is not the reason why he does not see him - just some extra to the story.
Multiple times, Colin was "given" things from his father for either a birthday or a holiday.
Given is in quotes because these are things that were never intended for Colin to actually keep. He has been given: a telescope, a fishing pole, a sled, and a dog. Yes, a real dog. I am sure there are more, but since he does not have them, I lost track. Colin was told that he has no use for these things where we live so that is why they stay there.
Um, you can keep the dog (sorry dog lovers), but I live in the country, I guess we don't need a telescope. Oh, and the river is just around the corner, but I guess the fishing pole would not come in handy.
These things are always REQUIRED to be left at his father's house. Seriously, WTF.
Now, yes - these are things that are very useful at his father's house. The live on a lake and get lots of snow and love to star-gaze. Fine, the 2 times a year that he is there, he will bring all these things with him.
In the past few years, his father has been getting in the habit of "giving" Colin board games for christmas. Sounds like a good gift, right. Well, he makes him leave them there! He father says that they have to stay there so they have something to do when Colin visits - TWICE A YEAR!!!! This has been a few years now, so Colin comes home with NOTHING. No gifts.
So, of course I pick Colin up today from his visit. I asked him about the presents he got for Christmas. He tells me he got Electronic Battleship, he tells me how cool it is and how much it has changed since the "original". He then proceeds to tell me that his father wanted it to stay there.
When Colin was packing his stuff, he father brought it back upstairs. Colin went and got it to pack and his father said "no, it was bought for you - but it has to stay here." You can't be serious.
Colin stood his ground and told him, "well, it is a cool game and I want to play it with my friends" I guess it went back and forth a few times, but in the end, Colin brought the game home. I can actually hear the conversation in my head......
Seriously, WTF!!!!!! You see your kid 2x a year, why the hell would you buy him stuff that you have no intention of him using. The larger things (we all know) were not real gifts. But, board games!!!!
It is like, "here is your gift, see you in 8 months so we can play with it"
If it was the situation of shared custody, or an every other weekend type of thing - well then I guess I can understand that. That makes sense to me. But, he only goes there twice a year.
We do NOT have a court order or anything that states that he has to go to these visits. I have FULL LEGAL custody of Colin with NO ordered visitation. Which means, in english, I am not required to send him there.
This past summer, he told me that he did not want to go. I told him he really should because 1. it is still his father and 2. it is the only time he sees his grandparents.
I really think this is it. As much as I don't want to be the "bad" guy and tell him he can't go - Colin is starting to actually express the fact that HE does not want to go.
Oh - and there was another thing that happened with a sneeze - but that would be a whole post in itself.
The whole thing just really pisses me off and the thing that gets me even more upset is that this jerkoff is hurting MY KID!!!
Sorry - just had to vent that out.